Story | If only…

If only I have a website to show my design work…
If only I have a graphic-oriented portfolio…
If only I know how to make animated illustrations like gif…
If only I had studied fine arts instead of architecture…
If only I chose to pursuit graphics…

If only I did not choose to get my revenge…
If only I had believed in myself…

Is everything too late now?


2009/05/31

Story | Light Years

Distance away. I can feel it. You can feel it. We are million miles away from each other. Physically and psychologically. I have not see you in person for years. You do not know how I think nowadays. None of us are able to understand each other’s feelings anymore.

Maybe you are turning into every boy’s dream. Maybe I am becoming the next icon. Who knows. Who will actually know what will happen in the next second. Perhaps both of us will vanish and disappear forever and ever. Possibly incarnation exists and we are each granted a new life. Maybe this time we will never meet. Which is essentially nice.


2009/05/25

Story | Glasses

Is it your glasses that made you attractive? I can’t stop laughing at myself for processing this question since grade twelve. It’s funny that I found you look very different with your bold black frames off. I’m such a shallow person. Easily magnetized by a created, accessorized outer appearance.

Is it true that glasses do make people appear to be hotter and sexier? Or do they actually hide away ugly parts of the wearers? I think it is both. Girls and bois with outstanding eyewear attract me; a large portion of me is well hidden behind my very own pair. You dropped by once after being gone for long, and said I looked different. Really, I’m still the same person. No that was not true. My frame of mind had altered since you first knew me. Well it actually changes every moment. I’m under metamorphosis continuously without pauses.

Maybe switching to a new pair of glasses would help. Or abandoning them to erase all the horrible memories.


2009/05/24

Story | Change and Memory

If one of the following changes,

subject
object
location
time
season
climate
experience
...

the precise feeling can no longer be felt.

The moment of intensity will be erased,
only existing in our memory.


2009/09/15

Story | Confession

Is it bad that I admit I chose to stay in a relationship with you solely because I want to be attached, politically and physically, but not exactly emotionally? Earlier today I found our minds had very different values on habitation. I mean, I cannot force you into things you do not prefer. I know that is just selfish. But did you think about my living? I belong to another world, a world which I believe is relatively more panoramic than yours.

Oh, did I say I remain together with you because I truly believe that one cannot squeeze out creative juices without emotions? Keep this in mind please, before I hurt you. I was, and am, using you as a handy catalyst for the output of my creativity. From previous experiments, it was proven that better projects came of the machine when affectional stuff are fed into it.

I feel very guilty and bad. I am a very self-centered person. You should condemn me into a non-returnable black hole.


2009/09/13

Summary | September 5th, 2009

1. getting lost in alleyways and piazzas

2. dragging luggage for 600m over pebble stone pavings
3. living in a really nice apartment (or at least the entrance looks very fancy)
4. stole wireless internet
5. ate gelato; chocolate chip flavoured
6. having a bad cramp (one that i've never experience before)
7. not having cold water coming out from the tap (hot water works though)
8. having jet-lag and felt like flowing when i walked
9. people mistaken you for korean
10. falling asleep on the couch as i typed this, waiting for the bathtub to drain water

random thought from Seoul

Precisely at this moment, I'm sitting on the fabric-mounted benches in front of the departure gates at Inchoen airport. Obviously weird mixed feelings raised up.



But why though?



My only explanation is the lack of a nice shower and good sleep, plus the complicated processing nature of my mind.